I’ve arrived in Sydney, a little dazed, a little confused. Apparently that’s jetlag and it’s something to do with circadian rhythms, cortisol surges and melatonin…although right now I can’t quite remember my name and could easily believe that jetlag’s caused by blue-edged tomatoes and overripe watermelon and comes with an easy cure of standing upside down in a vat of warm jelly.
But instead of listening to any of that nonsense, I’m going to attempt to cure my jetlag by throwing myself into the pounding surf of Bondi.
After all, I’ve surfed before. What could possibly go wrong?
Wish me luck and I hope I make it back in one piece. Not sure I could bear the thought of my final few words involving references to strangely coloured fruit…